this woman's work...

today MY was in the fourth grade science fair. i had to work so i couldn't go but she did awesome.... she didn't win but she has wonderful sportsmanship and she got a trophy, which is always nice. i hate being a working mom....missing out on important events like this kills me! will my kid grow up wishing her mom was there to support her more...am i doing enough...those are questions EVERY working mom beats the shit out of their self with.... but i know I do a lot... i just hope i;m not missing anything. my plans for the weekend.... 1. cheerleading practice- 2. my little cousins champagne party 3. church 4. date night with MY (a gift for getting to the science fair)

RESULTS!

My new anthem for the rest of this year is "specializing in results"!

I did my friend KEY's hair and it came out AWESome!

No pics yet...but come soon!

Experiment....

A long time ago in a far away land…. Nah, just kidding… a long time ago I did a post of my various hairstyles.

Well, I have a lot of friends that have asked me to do their hair. I’ve had ladies out on the street ask me to do their hair; but I keep telling people that I don’t do hair I just do my own.

The truth is what if the style doesn’t come out good? I am at fault! Or what if their hair falls out?! I don’t need anyone beating me up over her hair! Because I would fight a bitch about my hair!

Well, I have one friend, lets call her Key, really needs help. She’s a great girl really…but her hair game is not up to par. She’s the girl that always leaves her hair in way too long…

My other home girl her hair would normally be shot to hell as well….but she got the message when her sister finished cosmetology school…now she gets her DID every week. She was 35 wearing buns to work… but now she’s all super asymmetrical hair cut stylish chic girl…

Anyways my homegirl Key, asked me to do her hair. She’s short on funds… and I invited her to go to a party with me on Saturday (so I especially, want her hair to be cute.) *cheesy silly smile.

I’ve even thought to myself…she should let me do her hair. Finally this week she asked me to do it. So this Thursday for the first time I will be doing someone’s weave.

Now I am my OWN weavologist; I keeps my hair WHIPPED! but I will be weaving up some one else…. And I’m a lil scared….

Here’s the crazy part….I never do a full head weave on myself. I like it better when I leave a lil bit out…. but she wants no hair out… So I am going to be doing someone eslse hair in way that I’ve never done….

I went on to youtube and checked out a few chics and their closing styles and If KEY doesn’t want to buy the closure, then I am going to use the wrap around and glue and then inert it the closing and then sew in procedure….. We shall see…. I will definitely post and let the WORLD know how it came out….

Friday was so much fun.

I ended up wearing this bohemian inspired, blue, purple, white, black, gold printed, off the shoulder mini dress with a black wide band belt that fit just under the breast, and my knee black high boots. I’m wearing my hair with swooped to the side bangs and big curls all over…so the out fit all sort of "fit" together.

*****

Vh1 was supposed to go with me…but in his true Libra-esque anti-social style he flipped the script on me and didn’t go. He went on a run with his uncle instead….so I went to another social event ALONE. Sigh. Well at least I was cute.
I told him through drunken sobbing tears Saturday morning that it hurt my feelings that he didn’t want to go with me. I told him I love him so much that I want to share him with other people…he said that he never looked at it that way and he’d work on it. I believe him.


******

At the party, I found three of my friends who came to the event coupled up but through liquor induced bad girl-ness decided we head out girls only" to hit up the after hours, just us four girls.
I’ll tell you something about Belizean folks…Those heffas can party! It was 5 a.m. when I left because my feet hurt and I could barely hold my eyes open and I was already beginning to have a hangover, so who knows what time the other three left.

I got home safe, passed out across my unmade bed and slept for a few hours, threw up, and all was well.

You know those jokes folks send through email…. "You know how you know you’re old" well I know I’m old because my bank put a hold on my Debit card because they thought the late night bar charges were out of character and thought someone had stole my card!!!
LOL so sad.

*****

I took my daughter and my little cousin to see Coraline on Saturday…its scary. Like not just for the kids…for me too.

******

Then I took the girlies to Hometown Buffet…..(my cousins Bri’s girlfriend had given me some "kids eat free" coupons …) and Let me tell you….their barbeque is the bizness!!!! Me and the girls sat there for almost 45 minutes stuffing our faces….LOL. No wonder I need to loose this extra 20 pounds!!! Damn barbeque.

******

Why is it so windy here in Cali today? The wind is blowing like crazy…good thing I got the messy big curls hair today.

******

I had a pretty tough morning this morning…. I left my cell phone at home…I broke two fingernails!!!…My skin is super dry…. This stupid V05 hair spray is making me flaky! And I have on a black shirt…I burned the top of my mouth with my coffee and something’s wrong with one of my rims so it keeps making my tire pressure low.

*****

I still haven’t found anyone to pick up MY and keep her for less than 30 minutes a day…not since my father bitched out on me…pulled his same life tricks … sigh….life is so difficult when you’re having fun.

** ****

I will be eating Pho today for lunch….if you don’t know about Vietnamese noodles you better get in the game!

** ****

Please somebody tell CrazyC to stop calling me asking me when are he and I going to have a baby.....lol the boy is a mess...

******

Funny story about my daughter: last night vh1, MY and I went to CVS. While I paid for the goods, MY and Vh1 pretended to do the tango… they danced all around him twirling and spinning her like she was a little princess. I loved it. The two people I love loving each other….I wish I had a camera with me. I love the fact he could careless how silly he looked he just wanted her to smile.

Once we got into the car, MY kept asking me if I was ok. She asked me three times before I really realized she was asking me the same question over and over. Finally I ask her "Why are you asking me am I ok?" She says "I just wanted to know if you were jealous over how me and Vh1 were dancing…" Vh1 and I laughed with surprise. She says "Yeah maybe next time you should dance with him like me."

My kid is crazy.

I'm a face book junkie now.

I know I’ve asked this question before; but really, why are haters everywhere?
They feed on the scent of folks minding their own business, don’t they? They just can’t leave me alone. I’m in my cubicle I’m doing my business.

Sigh….

***

So my weekend turned out pretty good up there in Northern Cali.

Saturday morning Vh1 called me at 4 am to make sure I got up for my flight at 7.

I arrived in Oakland at 8.

I rented a convertible white mustang….yea! So you know I was looking super fine valentine.

It was foggy and I was a little irritated that I couldn’t put the top down

I decided to have breakfast Denny's and then go over to the mall (which I found with the GPS system in my rental car)..

And who should I run into at the Denny’s? The maid of honor! She was there with her mom.

They invited me to breakfast. Since I hadn’t checked into my room, they invited me to stay at their hotel room with them (the room was free because the bride and groom paid for it) so I canceled my reservation at my hotel (extended Stay Deluxe) and stayed with them at the Sheridan.

After breakfast we went back to their room.

Their room was where the bride got dressed, so I got to see her getting her make up on and everything. It was very nice.

I got dressed after the bridal party went down stairs.

And when I went down stairs to get in my car and WHY did it have a flat tire! I was so irritated.

When I called the rental service the man told me that he couldn't get there in enough time to change the tire and for me to get to the wedding in enough time, so to "just get a ride" YES that is his exact words….I was heated.

So I got a ride with the Maid of honor’s mom.

The wedding was BEAUTIFUL. When I say beautiful, I mean simply beautiful. It was at a golf course south of Oakland in San Ramon. .

The ceremony was out side next to this lake. It was cold but It was worth it.

The two bridesmaids had strapless dresses that gathered on the side and had a diamond pendant on the side.

The maid of honor wore a chocolate dress that was almost just like Michelle Obama's inauguration dress and it had a diamond o the shoulder. They all carried orange sunflowers in their hands.

The bride’s dress was strapless and gathered at the breast and had a diamond pendant in the center. It was like sheer flowy material to the ground. She wore her hair in straw curls and had a flower in her hair.

The guys walked in to the instrumental to "The Light" by Common. The girls walked in to this song by Musiq and she walked down the isle to this song by India Aire. Her mom gave her away.

The pastor was funny and sweet.

They jumped the broom.

After the ceremony there was a cocktail hour in the bar area of the golf course. The groom’s parents brought paid for all drinks.... and there was a slide show full of pictures chronicling their 7 year relationship….yes she waited 7 years..

Then we went inside for the reception.
They danced to "If your love was all I had" by Justin Timberlake.
The cake was white with chocolate brown designs on it.
The party favors were a burlap sack with a glass of brown sugar and their names on it...and these heart shaped measuring spoons and each spoon said stuff like "a pinch of love" a spoon of caring...so on and so on.

****

After the wedding I got back to the hotel called the rental car service and cussed them out. They came and fixed the tire at like 12 in the morning.

Then I had to return the car at 9. So, I didn't get to really drive it at all. I complained about the road side assistance and at first the manager said to me "what would you do if it was your own car..." that pissed me off so I went off...... So, they gave me the car for half off.

I was tired and ready to go home so I didn't extend my rental and stay the rest of the day until my flight home at 8pm so I went to the airport and had Southwest change my flight to 10am.
I got back here in the Southland at 11am

****

There is still the issue VH1’s behavior…. Which I know y’all told me to stop tripping on…

Well Sunday night he came over …after my nap and we spent all day Monday together.
There was some issues going on with him… See, I know my man BLOG FAMILY!!
He confessed said issues…. No cheating…it was some legal stuff that I knew about…but didn’t really know about.

We’re back in the gang now…. All happy and fuzzy and in love.

***

My friend’s little sister is turning 24…. Gees, I’m old. And Vh1 and I are going to her birthday. I need help building an outfit… Any suggestions? At 27 I feel uber old. I want to be HOT but not old lady Hot…. New hip hottie Hot…. You know?
I love these black shinny leggings that are the rave now…. And I like mini dresses…so I’m thinking of going in either of those two directions…. But I got fat knees lol and a big butt and a chunky middle LOL!!!!!! So I don’t know if my body wants to go in either of those directions…

For the random of the moment here’s a picture of my niece.

good day.

so today i rode the bus to another court to get another abstract for another infratcion. then i went to the dmv paid the reinstatment fee....

I am officially a licensed driver for the first time in YEARS!!!!

shhh....I think I hear something...It's people loving me!

99 things I've done (mine are bold)

Stole this from Moody Gemini

1. Started your own blog
2. Slept under the stars
3. Played in a band
4. Visited Hawaii
5. Watched a meteor shower
6. Given more than you can afford to charity
7. Been to Disneyland/world
8. Climbed a mountain
9. Held a praying mantis
10. Sang a solo
11. Bungee jumped
12. Visited Paris
13. Watched a lightning storm at sea
14. Taught yourself an art from scratch
15. Adopted a child
16. Had food poisoning
17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty
18. Grown your own vegetables
19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France
20. Slept on an overnight train
21. Had a pillow fight
22. Hitch hiked
23. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill
24. Built a snow fort
25. Held a lamb--- I hugged one at the zoo, does that count?
26. Gone skinny dipping
27. Run a Marathon
28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice
29. Seen an eclipse
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset
31. Hit a home run...please I am afraid the ball will hit me...
32. Been on a cruise
33. Seen Niagara Falls in person
34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors
35. Seen an Amish community
36. Taught yourself a new language
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied...I make it now...if I could pay these bills off.
38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person
39. Gone rock climbing
40. Seen Michelangelo’s David
41. Sung karaoke
42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt
43. Bought a stranger a meal in a restaurant
44. Visited Africa
45. Walked on a beach by moonlight
46. Been transported in an ambulance
47. Had your portrait painted
48. Gone deep sea fishing
49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person
50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris
51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling-Catalina Island.
52. Kissed in the rain
53. Played in the mud
54. Gone to a drive-in theater
55. Been in a movie - I was an extra in the movie A.I., the scene where they say "kill the boy!" I was in the addience. I got hazarad pay because they used smoke.
56. Visited the Great Wall of China
57. Started a business
58. Taken a martial arts class
59. Visited Russia
60. Served at a soup kitchen
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies
62. Gone whale watching
63. Gotten flowers for no reason
64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma Only once, I passed out afterwards.
65. Gone sky diving-Vh1 and I are going to the indoor one at Universal Stuidos City Walk next month, it's part of what I brought him for Christmas.
66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp
67. Bounced a check
68. Flown in a helicopter
69. Saved a favorite childhood toy - His name is Bearbear.
70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial
71. Eaten Caviar
72. Pieced a quilt
73. Stood in Times Square
74. Toured the Everglades
75. Been fired from a job- Does just never going back qualify?
76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London
77. Broken a bone
78. Been on a speeding motorcycle
79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person
80. Published a book.. I'm a published poet though...
81. Visited the Vatican
82. Bought a brand new car
83. Walked in Jerusalem
84. Had your picture in the newspaper I was one of the LAtimes top 100 kids.
85. Read the entire Bible
86. Visited the White House
87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
88. Had chickenpox
89. Saved someone’s life
90. Sat on a jury
91. Met someone famous
92. Joined a book club
93. Lost a loved one
94. Had a baby
95. Seen the Alamo in person
96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake
97. Been involved in a law suit
98. Owned a cell phone
99. Been stung by a bee

oh yeah...My weekend....

*saturday, we were going to go to the fair, but instead we went to the beach.

*on our way to the beach we stopped at Togo's for sandwiches. we were all three in line, when this prince song came on...it was a hot mess in there how we were dancing.

*at the beach Vh1 and i played dominoes while MY built sandcastles. Than MY and I went down to the water and splashed around a bit. Then it started to get a little chilli so we packed it up.

*After the beach. we went to the shoe store (since vh1 wore Jordan's to the beah...we needed suede cleaner)there were these reebox's that have the monopoly board game on them...they were really cute (i don't know if men want to be cute...but yeah.) I'm thinking of getting them for his birthday....

*vh1 ordered pizza hut pasta. then liquored me up with wine and i think maybe vodka...i don't know.

*sunday, we did nothing all day until around 4 when i finally worked up the strength to do the laundry, i made vh1 come with me...even though he was disgusted that he even had to get dressed.

*we ate chicken.

*i braided MY's hair.

*then we watched this awesome movie called Felon.

*I brought MY a fish the other day. It's a purple male Beta fish named Charolette in a purple tank with pink and purple rocks lol...the poor thing is gender confused....sigh. he's so depressed. lol so sad

my weekend post...as usual...lol

as you all know I was pretty grumpy the last few days of the week last week. so i really needed to go out friday night.

stace called me and asked if i wanted to go to dinner, (i know i'm supposed to be loosing myself from our friendship....but because she has herself together this week i aggreed to go). we went to this resturant called wocano...one of my favorite sushi spots. i usually go to the one near the beverly center mall but we wanted a change of scenery, so we decided to go to the one downtown. the service was terrible. pretty damn terrible. we ended up having to tell the waiter that he is terrible. pretty damn terrible. the food was fantastic as always.... so that was good.

afterwards we walked up the street to this bar called 7grand. it's a whiskey bar...it's set up to look like we're on a train...kinda like wild wild west style. real laid back chill type place. we had a really good time. stace and i had no conflict.... it was cool.

once i got home vh1 came over....we had a little bit of an early morning arguement. i was mad at him for something he did, that he shouldn't have done.... i don't want to go into details...but it pissed me off.

early saturday morning was spent with him apologizing....the best way that ladies should be apologized to. for lunch we went out to eat. then we went and brought the rest of the items to finish MY's bedroom...(she's coming back Tuesday night.....my goodness how i miss my daughter)

saturday night we hung out and watched the black and white version of "Night of the living dead" why did everyone die?

sunday, vh1's cousin died. an older guy. he had a brain tumor, so we knew he was dying it was just a matter of when. he went to spend the day with his grandmother.

i broke my damn cellphone. so i have no numbers. can't get and make any calls. im depressed.
i orderd a new phone today so i should get it 2 moro or wednesday....i pray!

since vh1 was doing his family thing; kinkos and i went to see the Mummy. it was aiight...
afterwards we went to this bar called 4010. it's like bohemian themed bar, really nice atmosphere... we waited for our friend j to come join us and he bitched out...so we left there and went to this bar called the shortstop. sundays is du-whop night. they play all 60's type music...like james brown and diana ross and the jackson 5 we danced our little hearts out! i'm telling you we had too much fun. played a little pool. even saw a girl we went to junior high with.

kinkos dropped me at vh1's and he brought me to my house....which meant that i only had about 2 hours of rest last night....but mysteriously....I feel great! we'll see how long that lasts! I'm off of work 2morro and wednesday so maybe that has something to do with it....

what yall do this weekend?

aww...i've been on vacation....sorta.

i took off of work for thursday and friday. so that, i could get some rest. my eye has been twicthing like crazy prolly because i'm so worn out. so i took a mini vacay...lol. i didn't do a damn thing. just didn't go to work! lol

thursday: i slept until 12 and when i did get up i went super shopping! shopped all day!!! didn't get home until almost 9pm. i brought MY a bedframe for $30 at this thrift store. and I brought her a brand new mattress set for $59.00!! A princess bedset for $25 brand new curtains for $5. she is going to be sooooo excited!!! I plan on doing princess crowns stencils in dark and baby pink all over her room...
Thursday night vh1 came over. we ate bbq and watched a movie.

friday: we slept until 12. around 3 he went to get his hair cut while i got my toes done. then we went shopping at the mall.

fridaynight: i went to this club with the girlies. for a listening party for rapheal sadiq's new album coming out in september....he didn't even sing! how whack.

vh1 came over after he got home from hanging with his folks.

saturday: we slept until 3pm!! lol drunk and snorring. Then we got up and went to the movies to see Step Brothers. that mess was hilarious to me! My favorite line: "I want to fill a pillowcase with soap and beat the shit out of you with it." lolol....
Once the movie was out around 1030p, we went to the grocery store and brought food and vh1 cooked....we didn't eat until 1 but it was good (steak and asparagus).

sunday: we slept until 1pm. then got up and went to the 3rd street promanade. that's on the beach but not really. We kinda got into an arguement. i was weird. it lasted like an hour. We talked it out and all is well. After a few drinks we left the beach and went to this Mexican resturant by my house and ate. Then to this little bar down the street and played pool.

lol.....so i know i need to write a real post and not just a recap of my weekend maybe i'll write a real post soon....maybe.

Laughing my ass off.

Yesterday, I got an email from about this comedy show going on around the corner from my house. It was free (well fake free because, there is still a 2 drink minimum). I called all my girls all geeked up, telling them we have to go. None of the chicas were game. VH1 took his mom to the hospital to visit her cousin that has a brain tumor.

I was saddened. didn't really want to go by myself....but I figured what the hell. It's not like a club. It's a show. so guess what I did?

Went alone.

It was crackin! Prolly because it was fake free.... there was at least 200 people there. I got there early since I wanted to try to get a seat but I guess everyone else got thier early too. There were NO seats available. I found a little spot to stand, since there was standing room only. I ended up meeting this lady who was there by herself too. She was drunk and crazy but fun to talk to. Then she and I met another two ladies...so I ended up having a little homegirl crew. lol they were older like all over 45 but they were real cool ladies.

The comedians were ALL hilarious. Rodney Perry was the host. He is stupid funny. First was some guy that is on that show last comic standing. He was hilarious. Then was Kim whitley hilarious. Then Esaw, he was retarted stupid funny. Then Bill Belamy....Why did no one ever tell me how funny he is? He had me falling out laughing fun. He like basically tore down the house. Freaking tooooooo funny. He sucks in movies but his stand up was hurting my sides. Then was AJ Jamal he is funny but short since everyone basically had came to see Bill crazy self. and Last was Michael Colyar. his ass is funnnnnnnny. This guy tried to heckle him.....His ass got straight ghetto stupid with him.....

I must admit I had a good night out by myself. And I met so cool old lady friends too.

Lesson # 456: Respect your elders.

Friday.
I got my toes done. This beautiful color called Ecentric Orange. It is so beautiful on my chocolate skin. I want to wear it everyday! I got a cute little design...Oh how I love them.

My little cousin Nu, called and asked to ride with me to the family function. I told her, sure. She drove to my house and left her car there.

We ventured out to the beach. The beach of couse was CRACKIN! We had to park like 8 million blocks away and the park next to the beach looked like a mini city. Tents and folks EVERYWHERE. you could barely walk with out steppin on folks.

We somehow found my uncle and his tent and our spot. Pulled out the Dominoes and cards and radio, drank some wine and dark liquor, laughed it out with my family. Then I ate some of the best damn BBQ ever. Oh, what a lazy day. At 9, the city of Redondo did fireworks over the wonderful midnight sky. It lightweight made me want to cry.

Friday Night.
Nu and I needed to shake our booties; so we headed out to this pretty well known hole in the wall bar in Long Beach. We were standing there in line and this hispanic woman with two little boys came walking up. she was crying and looking terrified. Standing there just shaking. Her boyfriend or abuser or whatever, walks up and starts yelling at her in Spanish. the oldest...or tallest of her little boys, stuck out his chest and got real buck with homeboy, yelled "get off my mom!" and shoves the mess out of him. The man then socks the shit out of the lady! Right in her face! blood flew from her mouth and she screamed like her jaw was broke. She fell to the ground. The security from the club all jump up and cover him, socking him beating the shit out of him. Then one of the security gaurds starts going off. Cussing and yelling and screaming at his fellow security gaurds telling them they need to stay out of that man (the man on the grown moaning cause he just got and old fashion beatdown) business. I mean seriously angry, like he himself was an abuser. It was really sad. The security gaurd was so angry at the others that helped her that he got in his car and left.

Once inside the club, I grabbed a drink (French connection...of course) and had a seat with Nu at these little stools they have set up.

This man, about 40 sees me sitting and makes mention of my pretty toes. I smile and keep it pushin. Not my type. Not intrested in old drunk men. He comes over to us. Talking acting like we old friends. I roll my eyes try not to make nice. Not my type. Not intrested in men who can't stand up straight. He goes on and on about his job where he's "in the union" and makes $23 dollars and hour" WHO HOOO!...Not my type. Not intrested in a man who lies about his income. Nu (23 years old), maintains conversation with the man.

I know what this is leading to; so I try to avoid it. I'm a old playa. I know this man ain't shit or bout shit. I'm not excepting shit from him, no water, no drink, no company, nothing. not intrested, keep it pusshin.

Little cus, likes the attention, trying to get something for nuthin. What all these young girls I see out there are about. Trying to get drinks. Trying to get money...fuck that! Always, tell my little cousins, have yourself. Have $ for your own drinks. That way if a nigga you don't like offers you can always say no. Oh, how I wish they'd lean there's no such thing as something for nothing.

I know this man is trouble and I don't need trouble right now. He lets me know his name is Greg. I squint eyes at Greg he rubs his hand down my back. I say "don't touch me." As politely as a comment like that can be said; but I knew later there'd be trouble.

I tried to give little cus the signal, but she was loving that attention. Drinking and feeding on that attention. Greg, would not leave. He tried to scoop Jane up all night. Jane is not intrested. Greg could care less. He stood near us the whole night.

Supercutie enters the bar. He's with a chic that was somebody's jumpoff. I couldn't tell if it was supercutie's or his boy in the orange shirt. I met eyes with him and smiled. let him know i saw him. it took him all night, but he came over. We met eyes and talked with them for a minute. Finally, he asked was I here with anyone. I say no.

Greg jumps in between Supercutie and I and says "Me." I say "No, I'm here with my cousin Nu. that's it" Greg says, "naw baby, you here with me." and grabs my hand. Jane's first reaction is fire first. but I caught my self. I said "get the fuck off me. you don't know me nigga." he says "my bad, I'm sorry my bad." He walks away. I'm still tense. Wanna fuck Greg up now. My anger is building. Super cutie rubs my arm and feeds me some awesome game. Somebody's jumpoff, the girl, that was in his crew was burning a hole in the back of his neck.
Greg comes over to me several times. Rubbing my back. Trying to continue talking to me.

Finally, my anger explodes! I start cussing this man out like I knew him. I tell him to leave me the fuck alone. Get away from me. Stop touching me. The security swarm me. As I yeild my drink glass at this man, ready to bust him in the face. I yell obsence obsenities at him. pissed off. If I could turn red I would've been red. My head hurt from my lack of oxygen from yelling so long. The security walk greg out to the smokin area. Where Nu, had been all this time.

I stand there being comforted by supercutie. being eyeballed by somebody's jumpoff. I calm down. When the Dj plays a hot ass Red Rat song (reggae) and I keep an eye out for Nu. Making sure that Greg isn't saying shit to her.

She comes inside and she and I laugh about somebody's jump off. I don't get a chance to entirely explain what happened with greg. As he comes over and is buzzin in my ear again. I yell "get the fuck away from me" Lil cuz, looks at me like I'm trippin.

I'm ready to go. I pick up my shit. Supercutie walks me to the door. drunk greg close behind and Little cuz next to him. I frown at little cuz. but wait till I'm out side to address my concern.
I pull her collar and say "yo, homeboy is trippin.. Why you letting him follow you? he is crazy. stay away from him." Lil cuz says "Well, when we were outside he told me that you told him you'd give him a ride home. He lives around the corner."

I say "WhAT! I ain't giving nobody no ride. No where. Especially not no niga. Fuck that shit. How he get here? He a grown ass man! He can get a ride. Fuck that no."

She says" well he think he getting a ride. can't we just give him one? Don't be like that. He's ok."

I say" hell no! we don't know him. Fuck him. "

She says "Don't be a bitch Jane."

I say "What did you just say to me?" And give her the look. That ok. you've gone to far look.

She looks at me like she's a little nervous and I look at her like if she says another word I'll slap the shit out of her ass. I would have too if she would've said something eles. She didn't. she was quiet the whole ride back to my house. I told her to call me when she got home.

She didn't. I called her in the morning and she apologized for her disrespect.

When well these young girls ever learn?

My love affair...

I arrived home Friday evening to a wonderful surprise! FlatRandy decided to drop by.

I was so elated to see him! We caught up on old times as we sat at the bar and drank in my dinning room. He shared with me many tales of his numerous travels throughout the U.S. I listened intently....until I just couldn't take it, I had to kiss him....

After our embrace, he told me to get dressed so that he could take me out on the town. I showered and met him downstairs. He decided to drive the red car this day. Ooooo how I love the red car.

We stopped by Randy's donuts, http://randys-donuts.com/, for the tastiest, most delicious donut he'd ever enjoyed....

FlatRandy wanted to know where the real Lakers (who actually win championships) played.... so I took him by the Great Western Forum http://randys-donuts.com/

He wanted to spend a little money (mind you "little" is the key word) on me. So, we went to Downtown Inglewood on Market Street. http://www.latimes.com/news/la-me-inglewood16-2008jun16,0,1146177.story?track=rss

After our "mini" shopping spree. We went down the street to Hollywood Park Casino. He lost some $ playing roulette. http://www.hollywoodpark.com/

So we went out side to see the horses race.

FlatRandy didn't have proof that he was 18 years or older, so we were turned away at the gate.

Come to find out Flat Randy was plum out of $$... Well you know how Jane is.... move right on to the next.

we don't need no water...

I went to a bond fire yesterday.

I went to, what the natives here call "the negro beach"

(the only beach you're allowed to barbeque on... )

Please excuse the yuck-like-ness of my face in this photo; I'll blame it on salt water, wind, and smoot from the fire. My hair smelled like a chimmney today.

Over doing it, is a MUST when you go to negro beach.

Why is this picture is so hilarious to me? #1- home boy has on socks and gangsta shorts. #2. the guy the in the back is on his two way. #3 What the hell was I taking a picture of?

Some of myfolks tryna stay warm...

Oh....what a tangled web we weave...

so after two days of playing the he's-not-answering-his-phone game with e. i was getting my hair done on thursday...which came out simply beautiful, if i must say so my self i decided to send him a text that said it was over. done. finito. my hands were washed on the subject. he responded with a fury of phone calls and texts that i at first, refused to respond to.

all friday, i continued this silly game with him of "i'll call you right back". i had to stop and talk to myself and say "jane, what are you doing? how old are you? what is this game you're playing and why?" and so, when i recieved a call at 6:15am on saturday morning from a strained and by this time irritated e, i answered. i listened to 40 minutes of continuous explanation and even though, i was feeling 87% of what he was feeding to me, i decided to stay in my reserved position with him. i hung up around 7 with him, feeling like a chess player, like i had to decide which moves i needed to make....

around 10 i got a call from my friend that's a friend that i like more than a friend, lets call him VH1 for short, he wanted to make sure i was still rollin with him to his family gathering. i solidified those plans with him.

i got up got my toes done. somethiing about a freshly painted french tip that makes me feel uber fly.... go figure?! i got a fly ass fit for the day (skinny jeans, a black top and these cute little black and gold sandals). i picked up a gift for my daughter's fathers sister's baby shower-a rockawear pajama and bib set. came home and did up the make up and spiced up my flyness. haha.

the babyshower was strange. my daughter's father brought his girlfriend, that none of his family likes, to the shower. so when i arrived, his family was putting the ten on the two, about how much they like me. hugs and kisses were passed out. "oh, you look so cute's" were spread around generously. to the point were new girlfriend, obviously feeling uncomfortable, got up and went outside. i took that as my cue to make a gracious exit and had my daughter's father walk me to the car so he could get MY's bags (she stayed with him for the night) and i left.

i met up with VH1 at his families house, which happened to be right around the corner. he was looking pretty hot in a light blue "teenage millionaire" tee shirt and those first edition carmello's. i tried to ignore that fact. his family is super nice. one of those black families that you see on tv type nice. no one loud and obnoxious. just laid back. he fixed me a plate and cup of that remi and the good times began to roll. his cousins and i became instant friends and his aunts all winked at me. his uncles gave him the thumbs up and we started to act as a couple. not intentionally. sorta like on accident. i swear, i understand when people say they didn't mean for it to happen. it just started to materialize in that way. after about four hours of family fun. i caught myself in a momment of ten second eye contact with VH1. i tried to ignore it but it was nice. then vh1 asked me to the movies and i excepted.... we said our goodbyes to the family, feeling much like the Obama's leaving a convention., everyone had to say their two cents. uncles had to whisper thier advice and aunts had to stack up plates for us to "take home" and older ladies had more winks and cheek kisses for me.

on our way to the movies i checked my cell phone for the first time and saw i had four missed calls from e. i felt guilty. but decided not to let that ruin my good day...yes, i am an evil wench.
vh1 and i saw iron man. which jane had absolutely no intentions of ever seeing but LOVED. iron man is gangsta. i love when the chic says "tony stark do you remember me?" and he says "no." and keeps right on walking! guts. oh yeah...side bar: i saw muq (my ex-bestfriend that's now married with child, that i no longer speak to due to some shit that occured...read the blog i'm sure the stories there) at the movies. first time in years. she looked good. i was downstairs and she was upstairs so i didn't say hello but it was her for sure.

during the movie my cell phone vibrated 100 times. text messages from e. i texted him back an "i'm in at the movies, i'll call you when it's over." he wrote " i want to see you. miss you. i need to talk to you." my heart flipped...gosh.. i hate being human. we have emotions and guilt... animals don't have guilt.

i waited until i went to the restroom after the movie to call e while balancing in the stall and listening to a teenage couple (boy girl) humping in the stall down from me.... (i saw them sneak in) e answered. soundin distraut and sad. he wanted to come by whenever i got home. i agreed.(insert insults here)

after the movie, vh1 asked me if i was done for the night and i said no. so he and i went to this reggae spot near downtown. we slowwined and drank malibu bay breeze's all the night long. near the end of the night they play this song that had us dancing a little closer than i normally wouldv'e danced and he smelled my neck....yeah it was odd. but nice. sorta reminded me of a Jill Scott's song "He was fresh, like summer peaches; Sweet on my mind like block parties and penny candy.Us was nice and warm, no jacket, no umbrella, just warm"... we left the club once they basically put us out. walked across the street and brought one dollar tacos, we sat in my car and laughed and talked. the car filled with smells of onions and red raddishes and yet we still sat there laughing and joking.

he kissed my cheek and closed mouthed me on my lips and i had morning time preminitions of breakfast in bed (like that show"That's So Raven") i stepped back from myself and saw myself slipping down a slippery slope. i was already falling. somebody save me from myself!! i left it at closed mouth kisses at least until i figure out e and i.

when i got back to my car, i called e. he admited his wrongs and continued on with the long winded explanation from that mornings conversations. he met me at my apartment. we stood in my kitchen talking about things. going through things. he gave me the password to his myspace. i pretened to not want it (but you besta be sure that i checked it this evening.... i ain't dumb, nothing to big to report...i guess he had time to erase whatever he wanted me not to see). we sat in the living room until around 5. when i realized i was awake and yet sleep.

i succumbed to the sand man on the couch next to e. i woke up around 9 to my daughter's father calling me, begging me to come pick up MY (you know I can't understand why that man can't keep his own child for a full 24 hour period). i got to really look at e's face in the morning light on my couch. such a handsome face. but so many uncertainties, so many inconsistencies, so much unfinished business.

i left e, sleeping on my couch and went to change into something to pick up MY in, as i was doing that her dad called and said he'd keep her until 1. so i laid in my bed and went to sleep. about thirty minutes later i could feel e, come into my room and lay down next to me. i could hear him pretending to be asleep probably thinking about my uncertainties and inconsistencies.

i picked up MY while e stayed at my house. i called vh1 to thank him for the evening while i was out. once i got MY and got home and the three of us had lunch.

i had to dance for church evening service but my head just wasnt' in it.

later we went to NDN's sons party. e, MY and i. a small arguement insued about whether he was going or not. but when he realized i didn't have cable and we would be going to a place where there was a flat screen and satellite and the laker game, he put on his jacket and came. he met the crew. they liked him.

we came home and played a little x-box and he left. i spent the remainder of the night talking to vh1 and flores on the phone.

now i can't sleep.

and i'm hungry.

"cold going mad..."

I’ve got an eerie feeling this morning. Feeling empty. Like there’s a hollow in my stomach. So many folks have been running me raged lately.

Things seem so peachy keen with e. but in me something’s not right. Found out today that he has a MySpace account that is marked private. When I requested him as a friend he denied me. When I asked him about it…he gave me the switch the topic then the quick good bye. Since then the behavior has been suspicious. I’ve decided to step back from it a bit. Just breathe on it.

I mentioned my friend that’s just a friend last post and I must admit. I lightweight like him as more than a friend. So I’ve stepped back from that too.

BW cussed me out yesterday because I turned down on a night of fun.

This chic at my job is working my nerves. It’s like she’s going through menopause and we all have to suffer. She and my boss both.

My weekend is going to be fun. If all works out.

I’m getting my hair done tonight.

I have dance rehearsal Friday night.

Saturday I have to go to my daughter’s father’s sister’s baby shower.

Then Saturday evening I’m going to a Barbeque with my friend that’s just a friend that I like more than a friend but if it doesn’t work out with e he could be an option but I’m not thinking like that right? Right.

Sunday is my friend NDN’s son’s birthday party.

Sunday night I have to perform at church.

Monday I’m thinking about UCLA reggaefest but it’s $25 now!!! It used to be free. But now that reggae is so popular it’s 25! It went from free to $5 to $7 to $10 to $15 to $20 to $25 over the ten years that I’ve been attending…. But Mr.Vegas is going to be there and he is my FAVORITE artist so I just might bite the bullet and go.

drive-by blogging

* my bestfriend sonystudios is having her babyshower saturday...this mess is so last minute, i'm tempted to tell her i don't want to have nothing to do with it. oshe didn't know that the park charges $6 to park, so she didn't write that in the invitations, you have to reserve your spot at this park and it's wednesday and she hasn't reserved anything, she just brought decorations yesterday she still hasn't ordered the cake.
on top of all that is her attitude right now, if her eyes weren't already green, id tell her she's turned into the greeneyed bandit. its like its not a day to celebrate her baby coming she just thinking about the $ she could get. its light weight pissing me off.

* my newfound-old homegirl bonee told me today that she's bisexual today. not in a i-want-you-to-be-my-new-girlfriend type way, more in a i-love-my-ex-girlfriend-but-i-met-a-new-guy sorta way...like asking for advice. now i have friends that are gay. but they've never asked my opinion on what to do with they're mates....i tried to think way out the box when i talked to her like it was two dudes we were talking about but in the back of my neck deep down i keep thinking?! What you want taco over sausage?! get outta here!

* i swear e is from another planet. where did i find him from?yesterday. he made me dinner. rubbed my feet and we watched a movie....sigh. he's the cream of the crop....

* dont' get me wrong i don't have blinders on with e. i see some things in the distance that could cause issues with us but right now they are little things. not big ones like he's married, small ones like he's not a planner- he goes on a whim. ya know... no plans, just "i'm going to the bar to watch the game. two minutes later, ima come pick you up go to the bar and watch the game. three minutes later. ima come to your house and watch the game, four minutes later something else...i am so in this momment i'm not even concerned about the next.... la la la la la.

* the shoes i wore to work today are satan's playthings.

* i can't wait to get paid. new tires. a tune up. and a new weave.... sigh.

rainbow sherbert mixed with pop rocks...

* yesterday each scoop of icecream at baskin robbins was 0.31 cent for a foundraiser. so me and my lil chica stood in line about 25 minutes to get us 10 scoops (that was the limit). the baskin robbins in my hood, it's right next to a bar/nightclub...
so MY and i we're standing there and out of the bar comes some chic, fully loaded, her old grey haired dude holding her up...
she reads a sign that says "buy one get one free" and then says to me:
"I know you ain't standing in line cause it's by one get one free?" She's drunk and staggering. I respond by rolling my eyes. A hispanic teenager, standing near me said "no, it's 31 cent a scoop".
The drunk bitch says, still speaking directly to me out of the 100 or so people standing; "well it better be unlimited cause otherwise just go get it from the grocery store."
She had an uppitty swagger to her. A real Good-hair-bad-hair attitude about herself.
I replied "It's for charity."
She says "umph! well write a check and call it a damn night. Forget standing in line....I don't stand in lines...especially for ice cream" she throws her hand up in the air, real drama queenish.
I say "stop fucking talking to me.."
It stunned her and her sugar daddy...
She stands there, mouth open looking at me... I say "Seriously, don't say another fucking word to me.. " Her daddy-aged date pulled her own down the walk way...
Black folks! learn to drink with out acting a damn ass!

inside the baskin robbins they were playing the music loud and the kids were running around excited about getting lots of ice cream for no reason. and some old crotchy ass black lady walks up to the clerk ringing folks up and says "can you turn the radio down?" The chic already irritated because it's way more people then they used to in the store says "why?" The old wench says "because it's too loud." The girl says "no." the old wench says "You don't think it's too loud?" The clerk says "I'm not turning it down." neck sweiveled and everything... I loved it.

*I don't want to cook and who can make me!!! oh yeah the law says I have to give my kid three squares a day...dayum! crykee!

*Why is this

the only photo I took from my birthday party? I tried not to drink til the guest arrive...seems as if I may not have succeeded...?!

* my daughter asked me "what is hell?" I said "the opposite of heaven." she said "and heaven is where God lives." I said "yes". She said "so who lives in hell?" I said "The devil and people who disobey what God askes us to do." She says "like be nice?" I said "yes" and to not hurt people?" I said "yes" she says "I'm going to pray that God help me to be nice and not hurt people; because I want to live in heaven." WOW. I think she been here before.

*my neighbor is creepy as all hell... but his son is finer than a plate of yams with extra syrup..um um um.

* Why did I stay up until 12am watching R. Kelly's trapped in the closet? Why is the phrase: "crazier than a fish with titties" the funniest thing I've ever heard?

*Why did I watch Ashanti's video on mute yesterday because I wanted to see what happened but I didn't want to hear her?"

* Eric where are you?

*THE GAME!!! please tell me yall watch this?! this is the best show ever! so much drama...loves it!

*I pray that all my blogger friends be nice and dont hurt other people....peaches!

Hello. My name is Superficial.

Hello my name is Jane, and I’m a superficial person.
If you’re not up on game about mr.niceynice. back track and read up on it..

What lets me know that my superficial-ness is out of control is the fact that I am able to just fly away so easily because I know I wasn’t really attracted to him. I’m taking a deeper look at myself. But really what’s wrong with wanting to be physically attracted to the man you’re with?
Wouldn’t staying with him, because I like what he does for me and waiting for a desire to grow, gold-digger-ish?
Which is worst? Cutting it off because I don’t like how he looks or staying because I like what he does?

I felt so guilty the more I spent time with him and the more I saw him building the "story of us" in his head. His eyes were starting to gloss over with it…I couldn’t sleep because I felt bad. I felt like a hoe-cake, taking gifts from a guy I don’t really like. So I ended the relationship.


Here’s a recap of what lead up to this…
First Friday, we went to lunch together. That was fine.
Then friend day evening he called me and I told him I was at CVS buying liquor, he was like "ok, I'm bout to come up there." WTF? He doesn’t even drink, how he gon help me pick out liquor?
So, He comes up to where I am I pick out which liquor and am about to go home. He's like "I'll meet you at your house".
I say, "well I have a lot of cleaning up to do, just hit me up later".
He's like "well did you eat dinner?" I say "no". He says "I'll get you something and bring it to you."
So he goes to Carls Jr then he brings me some chili fries.
He asks what do I have to do, I tell him. He's like well I'll sweep your back steps for you...I say ok... Basically he just coming up with more and more reasons to stay.
He was just annoying me more and more: Walking over my floor that I had I just mopped, moving pillows I had just arranged, sitting on my kitchen counter after I just cleaned it, using the bathroom and leaving the seat up after I just poured that stuff that’s supposed to soak, lying on the floor while I'm vacuuming, leaving his shoes in the middle of the floor… just irritating my senses!!!
Then I was like "ok I'm tired."
He gon say "can I spend the night."
I was like "I guess." Purposely giving him attitude. He didn’t catch it and laid down.
He tried... to get it poppin but I had to shut that down immediately...I was so turned off and annoyed I didn't want anything. Plus I haven’t done anything with him anyway… Friday night was not about to be the night.

Then Saturday morning, he left my house and called me soon as he got in the
car. Then called again when he got home. I just stopped answering the damn phone.

All day he was texting and calling and really annoying me… like a bee all in my ear.

Then Saturday night, when the party started he went to his friend’s party first
so the whole time he is texting me asking "what you doing?" Over and over! How stupid!!!
My annoyance level was to 45 by then.

The party started at 8 so people didn’t really start arriving until 10.
Oh yeah, I invited Barbershop….hehe. He showed up looking fine. Um um um...
Barbershop brought his homeboy a cute lil shortie.
Barbershop was acting a little monkey wit me too talking about he could only eat if I made his plate. Why I gotta fix plates at my own party? I fixed his plate and set him down outside in the back yard so that I could keep mrniceynice in the house.

Soon as I got back in the house, mrniceynice showed up. He had told me earlier that he was bringing his friend but he showed up alone. Which meant he didn’t know anyone except me and Stace. So he wanted me to be all snuggled up with him... The J-ster was not having it.
On top of it his pants were black with squiggles on them a damn mess. He hadn't got his hair cut...so he had on a hat and a shirt that was too small; which made him look shorter than he already is and fat instead of husky. Just not ok.

I was drunk and wanted to dance with everyone who wanted to dance with me. All my cousins and friends and home girls were trying dance wit me and he was hating on it.
It was tooo annoying... I don't like that crap.

At the end of the night my cousin J-nice, called me outside to talk to me about not speaking to my sister, which he thinks is the absolute worst thing ever. I introduced mr.niceynice and walked to the end of the block with my cousin. Mr.niceynice got pissed… started telling me I was "dissin" him… He had had a drink and was acting buck with me.

That was the end. I told him to go home. I haven’t spoken to him since.

Sunday I woke up to a house full of people. People everywhere in every room on every surface that people could fit.We got up… cleaned up…packed up some food…some ice…some water and drinks and went to the park…

It was hotter than fish grease this weekend in SoCal. This is the weather we always bragging about but dang….it is HOT out here…Doesn’t even feel like we still in America.

This morning Barbershop called me and asked me to come to his new salon. When I got there, he had breakfast made for me it was the sweetest thing ever.

His homeboy, that came to the party with him was there, cutting some guys hair. Another two dudes were there working. The lil homeboy was all smiles and stitches…Like the two of them were talking about this before I got there. Like they were excited about something. It was cute.

That's that.
Spoon stabs are ok, I'm comfortable with my decsions...

the clock is ticking

I'm feeling funky fresh dope right about now. I don't know I'm revitalized.

my cousin J-nice called me and asked me to come wit him to celebrate his wife's birthday. i said yeah. i love yall two of course i will. he tells me to dress up and get fly, i inform him that jane is always fly....just in case he forgot.

so that was that. that was last week. the "event" is supposed to be this weekend.

why my cousin, j-nice, call me today, talking about "jane, i gotta upgrade you, ma." I'm like "what?" he says "from just coming to hang out, to planning it for me. i got to go to washington today." I was like "what?" He says " I rented a stretch Navigator, brought some champagne and some bottles of Belvedere, but I have no idea where to go, please Jane?"

wtf.... i couldn't tell my very own cousin no. so....

5 days to find and make reservations for 10 people. 5 days to find a club to accomodate the tastes of 25 to 40 year olds... (my aunt and uncle). 5 days to find a cute out fit...

I actually live for this sorta thing!!! I love planning...J-nice knows that shit! that's why he called me...he knows I like to be in charge of parties...

I even stopped and brought a dress on the way home!
black with gold link straps, inbetween the breast is a gold link to hold the breast together...it's too cute. it comes beyond my knees... I have two options for shoes. my gold strappy platforms that go around the ankle or my gold on strap shoes that go around the ankle....hmmmmmm....