Tuesday, August 19, 2008

update on Drama...

* After our misunderstanding on sunday. i was feeling a little co-dependent. sorta clingy. really truely not myself. not to the point where i was irritating vh1, but i was irritating myself.

* I was trying to decide if it was in our best intrest to spend the day togehter or apart; but, VH1 made it clear with me that his intention was to spend the rest of the day with me whether that was in my plans or not.

* MY decided she wanted to go to my aunts for the week... so she's gon again! I swear I rarely see the kid. I took her to my aunt, who was at a football game for Snoop's son's team. She hopped out the car kissed me and was on her way!

* By the time I got back to my apartment Vh1 and I were starving. He wanted to try something other than Mexican and Soul food. So we were going to go to this Jamaican resturant, but once inside the smell of the place made me gag... I love Jamacian food, so that's not what was amiss...it was a dirty, stuffy old people smell that made me lightheaded. The table tops were greasy and the pictures on the menu looked slimy. Vh1 saw my face, without saying anything he grabbed my hand and we left.

* We went to this Chinese resturant called Twin Dragon. The food was off the HOOK! Man if you're ever out that way: Please try the Spicy Chicken Chow Mein. OMG..... DELICIOUS! and it's cheap like $8 a dish.

* Vh1 and I were both deathly tired. To the point that we were unable to hold a conversation with each other.

*I noticed he didn't put his hand on my leg as we drove home. That made me a little sad. But I didn't dare bring it up.

*He was in a trance the majority of the day. All the deaths that he's been having in his life lately forces him to face his on immortality-hard for folks our age to deal with. something so distant is right there in your face...6 in the last month. A cousin-brain tumor, a friend- brain cancer, a friend- heart attack, a friend-shot, his friend is a foster parent and woke up and one of the babies died of SIDS, and now this friend. He had NO ENERGY. His ora was a shady, foggy colored grey. He wasn't him. He couldn't concentrate. He's already touchy feely, but he was even more so. Holding my hand, rubbing my face, footsie under the table. I was feeling the same way kinda like I wanted to be touching him, close to him... weird huh?...I think so.

*Once we got home....I mean to my apartment. I got a call from Stace. She said she was downstairs and to come check out her new car. I went down and chatted with her -the good for nothing boyfriend moved to to NewYork and didn't tell her- the job's going good- she brought a Jeep Liberty.

* I came back up stairs to a peaceful sleeping semi naked man laying in my bed and claimed my spot in that perfect space where his arm connects to his shoulder...SAFETY. sigh.

* In the morning, he stood in the door way of the bathroom watching me do my hair and brush my teeth and scrub my face. He talked my ear off, like usual. He joked that I'm a gangsta. And that I had set tripped on him.

* In the car he slid his hand down my leg and squeezed my thigh. I felt relieved.


E said...

awwww lol..

im sorry to hear about the losses he's dealing with, i know the feeling. at least you're there for him though. y'all are too cute.

Nina said...

Awwww...It is a lot to deal with. At least you are there for him. All you can do is just...that. be there..listen...maybe you're feeling his pain and that is translated into you two wanting to be closer to each other, like a defense mechanism.